Chapter 32
Zara’s POV:
When I hear a door slam open, I tilt my head to the side. Nina was standing there with a box of pizza. She dropped the box and lifted a finger.
Quickly, I pushed William away and promptly sat up. I can feel the bed creaking, indicating that William was sitting up too. “Hi, Nina,” he said casually.
–
“Hi,” she responds, shooting me the what the fuck–look.
I replied with a shrug.
William clears his throat, but my eyes were still awkwardly locked on with Nina. “I’m going to go,” he said.
He grabs my chin, placing a kiss on my cheek, “I’ll see you later, Angel,” he whispers.
I sat there and watched him as he walked out. He messed up.Nina’s hair.
“Aren’t you going to kiss me too?” Nina said mockingly.
William chuckles, “I don’t kiss girls with boyfriends. That’s a death wish,” he walks away.
Swiftly, Nina kicks the box of pizza towards me and slams the door shut. “Code fucking whatever the color below red is on the rainbow! What in the world was that?!”
Nina and I made color codes for emergencies, with violent being the lightest and red, the most massive shit that can happen.
I grab the box. “What was what?” I replied with a nervous laugh and opened the box.
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“You and William! On the same bed!?” She pointed at my bed, then hugged herself trying to re–create our position earlier.
“We slept on the same bed since I was eight.” I grab a slice of pizza.
She sat down beside me, narrowing her devious eyes. “And that kiss on the cheek?”
I take a bite. “He kisses me all the time if you have forgotten.”
Nina nods, “Yeah, that’s true,” she replies, grabbing herself a slice.
Yes, it’s that sad. William and I could be caught on the same bed, and no one will think it’s a big deal because he only sees me as a little sister.
Little sister, that’s who I am.
Stupid heart, when are you going to accept that..
“Why are you here?” I ask.
She taps a finger on the box. To celebrate you in becoming a cheerleader,” she grins.
I smile. “God, you are such a good friend.” I shove another slice into my mouth.
After we finished, we laid on my bed, staring at the ceiling. “So, you know things with William, and I are going nowhere. How are things between Kevin and you?”
She shrugs, taking a light sniff. “Fine, a normal couple, I guess.”
I chuckle lightly. “You sound like a girl in mad love,” I said sarcastically, nudging her shoulder.
Nina turns her head towards me. “I’m fine with where we are. No fights and no secrets. Kevin is a good guy, and I like him.”
“But, not in love with him.”
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“One day, maybe, but not now. After all, I’m still just a high schooler,” she states, and I nod in agreement. We are just in high school, after all.
Soon, Nina bid me goodbye with one of her horrific dancing, while tripping down on the floor a few times. Grabbing some clothes, I took a shower and changed out of the uniform.
I sat down on the spinning chair and scrolled through Princeton along with a few other school websites. I read the emails I’ve been getting from recruiters. Holding the mouse, I adjust my glasses and push the reply button. My fingers went to the keyboard, but I didn’t know what to write.
A call pops up on my computer screen, and a smile emerges. Swiftly, I accept it. “Hey, Zara in Wonderland,” Randy’s face pops up, hair being thrown in all sorts of locations. My eyes scan his room, seeing it the same as usual, dark as fuck just the way he likes it.
“What’s up, Randy?” I reply, leaning down my chair, hearing it squeaking lightly.
“Just chilling, kind of bored. What are you up to?”
“Replying to some emails,” I said. I move my mouse back and forth.
“Is it one of those wealthy privileged colleges recruiting you again?” He said teasingly.
Randy is the only one who knows about these ivy league colleges. I haven’t told anyone about it, not even Nina. Sometimes, I feel bad keeping things from her, but with Randy. It is so much easier to tell him..
Nina and I grow up together, but our lives are quite different, making it harder and harder to link together with her nowadays. It’s not her fault, of course not. I’m the one who had been pushing her away. I’m grateful she is so understanding and hasn’t been a bitch about it even though she knows I’m keeping secrets from her.
Damn, what did I do to get such a wonderful friend like her?
“Yeah,” I reply, typing on different social media pages and maybe stalking
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Chapter 32
William.
William and I are friends, so it’s not stalking, merely seeing what he had been up to lately. I scroll down his pages seeing photos of us, and smile. William isn’t much of a social media kind of person, so there is rarely any post.
stopped when I saw a photo of us when I turned fifteen, and he took me to Disneyland. Unfortunately, his girlfriend at the time was also there. William is what many call a player. I think I saw him changing girls more than when he changed socks. I know it’s st
of me, falling not only with an older man but a player. William never posts any photos of him and his ex–girlfriends. I guess I can’t help but feel special that he posted pictures of us together.
“Zara!” Randy shouts.
“What?”
“Stop staring at the photo of you and that, William jerk!” He scorns me.
I spin around my chair. “I’m not,” I try my best to deny and deny, but I know he didn’t believe me as his continuous head shaking.
“You shut up! You like Carly, but won’t accept it!” I said but instantly regretted it.
He narrows his eyes at me. “We promise not to talk about that again!”
“Then, let’s not talk about William, and I won’t talk about Carla!”
“Fine!” He screams.
“Fine!” I shriek.
“Good!” He shouts louder
“Fucking fantastic!” I nearly screamed from the top of my lungs.
He pouts and leans back while I do the same thing. We start doing our weird usual glaring showdown. I can tell he refuses to back down. and I am not backing
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Chapter 32
down either.
Slowly, I can see him breaking.
“Fuck! Fine!” He pinches his eyes together and groans, leaning his body forward–Randy leans one elbow against his desk. “I’m just saying, once again. Zara Lee, do not throw away your future for a damn boy,” he said in a fatherly–like tone, pointing a stern finger at the screen.
“He isn’t a boy,” I mumble.
He rolls his eyes, tilting his head in a small circular manner. “Of course, he is a man,” he said in a mocking tone, waving two hands in the air, making this stupid–looking dance.
Then, he stops and narrows his eyes. “But, remember” he leans forward, “That’s what makes this whole situation inappropriate. You are still in high school. And William?”
I knew what he was going to say next.
Randy is talking about our age difference. Even if there is the smallest possibility that we get together, society won’t accept us. In the end, he is a twenty–four years old man.
Eight years, eight fucking years between us won’t seem like such a big deal two: years. But, right now, it feels more prominent than ever.
“I understand,” I mumble, fighting the urge to cry.
“I hope so,” he releases a breath of air. “I care about you, Zara, a lot. You have a chance to start a new life, away from here, away from your father,” his eyes start tearing up. “A lot of people would want that chance.”
“Would you take that chance?” I ask.
“In a heartbeat.”
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“Even if it means leaving your mother behind?”
He sat there silently, staring at me, but I know he wasn’t looking at me. There was a tiny hint of emotions in his face, a surge of guilt. Randy loves his mother a lot, which is why he hasn’t run away from home. He can’t leave his mother.
“It’s not the same, Zara.”
I tighten my grip on my chair. “You’re right. It’s not.”
“I got to go,” he said and logged off before I can reply.
You fucked up, Zara.
You really fucked up.
I always knew that Randy’s mom was a soft spot for him, and I was stupid enough to bring out the topic.
Leaning back against my chair. I stare up at the ceiling. “Oh fuck.” I grab my jacket before rushing out. Passing the living room, dad was fast asleep on the couch with an alcohol bottle in his hand, mumbling something again.
I shake my head, grab my shoes, along with my keys, and walk out. Throwing on my jacket and hood, I continue walking. I stare at the ground and refuse to stop until I get to my destination.
My ears can hear booming music and loud voices, but I ignored everything. I keep my head down low.
“Hey, there, little mama! Looking for some good loving tonight?” A man shouts.
This is the kind of neighborhood Randy lived in, the bad part of town. I glanced down at my watch.I had been walking for over two hours, and I knew I was almost at his house.
When I reached Randy’s house, silently I crept towards his window. “You filthy whore!”
